confession...

I'll admit it. It's been bugging me all morning. You know, a girl has to make her own way in this world, and it really hurts when someone else takes credit.

I mean, Paris Hilton now has a goat. And it is just so hurtful!! It cuts me deep.

First, Paris is such a superstar. She has the money to circulate those videos and with the hotel thing and all... Of course, if *I* get a goat, nobody knows about it unless they stumble upon my blog, or they get my Christmas letter. But for PARIS, I mean, come on! The girl tries to take her goat on an airplane and it's picked up by every major news network. Even though I was the first one of us girls to get goats, she will get all of the credit because there are not paparazzi keeping vigil on my back 20. I just don't have that kind of cash or those kinds of connections- or those kinds of videos. But do you think she will give me the credit for being the first goat girl? Hell no. That's how she is.

Also, I fear for the goat's well-being. Goats aren't partial to traveling. I know that first-hand. We had to use the extra-large pet porter airline kennels to haul them around. The article says that Paris hauled her goat back to LA in her "rental car." While I know that it doesn't specifically say that she didn't rent an SUV or a pickup truck with a livestock trailer, I am really picturing her showing up at the rental counter (all pissed off after being kicked off the airline) with her goat on a leash with her rhinestone-studded pink collar and lead, and the guy behind the counter handing her the keys to the subcompact because "that's all we have left, Ma'am." So I see Paris and her monkey (have I previously mentioned my hatred for monkeys?), her dressed up dog, her ferret and her goat all crammed into the Ford Focus for six hours to LA. I just don't envision Paris stopping at the rest area to take the animals out on the doggy trails. Besides, goats have HORRIBLE bathroom habits. They just go when the spirit (or the bowel) moves them. So that had to be one rank Ford Focus by the time they got to LA. And I've been to the zoo, monkeys stink as well.

Thirdly, Paris has a history of casting aside her unwanted pets. Quoting from ABC News here (on why she's been voted worst Celebrity pet owner):

"First she loses Tinkerbell, then she ditches her for a cuter dog, then replaces that dog with a ferret, then a kinkajou monkey and then, I gather, a goat," Padgett said in a statement. "Recently Tinkerbell was spotted back in Paris' arms. But how long will she be in favor this time?"

I heard she abandoned Tinkerbell and left the dog with her mother. I'm sure her mother will want a cast-off goat. In the penthouse of the Waldorf-Astoria.

This can't be emotionally healthy for the goat. And what, does she think that her little menagerie will suffice for a herd for her goat? Goats need OTHER goats! Goat's don't consider monkeys part of the herd. Or ferrets. And they eat grain and alfalfa and minerals. I can't see her having a bale stashed in her Gucci bag (though they do make some tidy alfalfa cubes, which could be marketed to fashion plates). I can see her breaking out her extra-large-sized pill box and handing her goat-ie some cubes 6-8 times a day...

I'm really sick about this.

And if Paris Hilton gets a llama, I am totally going off the deep end.