Iowa

I am not an Iowa native. But after living in England for 3 years, I didn’t think that coming to Iowa would be that much of a culture shock.

And it really wasn’t.

Iowa is a great place, and nothing that I am saying here is really disparaging the great state, it’s just pointing out the differences.

And there are some differences.

They say things differently in Iowa. Like there is a town called Madrid. No, NOT like Madrid, Spain. Madrid, Spain is pronounced kind of like Muh-DRID. No, in Iowa it’s like MA-drid. Kind of rhymes with “rabid.” And there is a town called Laurens. I would say it like the possessive of a girl—that’s Lauren’s book. NO, not in Iowa! You say it like Luh-RENZ. And the town of Peru? It’s PEE-roo. What’s up with that?

There is also the May day thing. Do you celebrate May day? Here you make a basket for your friends, and secretly leave it for them. We have made them for the neighbors and leave them hanging on their mailboxes or their doorknobs.

Beggar’s Night is also a local tradition. They don’t have Halloween or trick-or-treating (well, they DO, but they don’t call it that). Here kids go from door to door, dressed up in costumes, around Halloween time, but they have to tell a joke. If the joke is worthy of candy, then they get the loot. So while you ensure your kid is all decked out and in costume before he goes out, you also ensure that your kid has his joke ready.

Do you know what a kaibo is? It’s a port-a-potty. Um yeah, took me a while to figure that one out. Our realtor mentioned something about a kaibo at our construction site. I was thinking, “I don’t remember discussing that upgrade with the builder! I hope it’s included.” I had no idea it wasn’t some sort of lighting package or fancy insulation… Some people also call it a Bob, but I don’t know if it’s an Iowa thing or not. Kaibo is definitely Iowa.

There is also the typical vocabulary of the Midwest, but to me that is not unique to Iowa. I grew up saying groceries go in a sack or you drink pop, etc.

But we sure never peed in a kaibo.